Matrimonial Magic

Matrimonial Magic

A mystical but often overlooked magic exists within a great marriage. Little things, all around, you change without you physically touching anything. Toilets can suddenly be spotless. The dog hair abruptly vanishes from the floor. The laundry that you needed to stay up late to fold unexpectedly appears folded in your dresser drawers.

I have been married almost ten years to a remarkable man. I get up in the morning and the recycling is taken out to the curb! Magic! I never touch a bill, and yet they are all paid. Magic! Groceries sometimes appear in the fridge! Ice cream in the freezer. Stamps are in the desk when I need them. Magic. Magic. Magic.

I think in any marriage of almost a decade, it's easy to get caught up in the idea of equitable division of labor. I take care of the kids. He goes to work. And vice versa when I work a  twelve hour shift overnight. He takes out the trash,  and I do the dishes. I cook. He balances the checkbook. It feels like a quid pro quo. A simple exchange of services where each person fulfills an obligatory, previously agreed upon role. I can get lost in these mundane rhythms of our life. 

But one beautiful autumn morning, I woke up, still bleary-eyed and exhausted from the interrupted sleep you get with restless baby, to an emptied dishwasher, recycling at the curb, and laundry folded in a basket. Suddenly, I appreciated that even though I'm still (eagerly) awaiting my admission letter to Hogwarts, I do get to live in a world with a special kind of magic. I don't have little elves running around doing household chores. I need to remember that each completed task is an act of love by my husband. One of the aspects that most delights me about our marriage during this season of baby/toddler-induced insanity is how often I feel like my life is magical. Even with tasks that might appear very ordinary and unimportant to an outside can make this often-stressed mommy's heart fill with fantastic flutters.  Each time he comes home to the laundry done and dinner made, I hope he feels that tinge of joy that comes with being reminded that he is valued and loved.

This mindset can make even toilet cleaning (a chore my husband and I both loathe) seem a little bit magical. 

did anything magical happen around your home today? 

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